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Madge And The Scottish Dogwalker? How Can The Spinster Compete With The Gristle?

Just act casual. No one will suspect a thing.Just act casual. No one will suspect a thing.Let's face it. Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler were never really an item. They have/had a movie to promote and that's the Spinster's MO - play it up with a co-star (or paid escort) for the premieres then let him off the leash. They probably threw him a bone for macking it up the way they did. Since a brief and cordial vacation in Mexico they haven't been spotted together.

That's not to say that the Scottish cocksman has been idle. Big dogs, little dogs, short dogs, tall dogs, Gerry's got a leash to fit them all. He looks to be following in the footsteps of Mickey Rourke, who recently bragged of bedding more than a dozen women a night. Butler does appear to have better taste than Rourke, though. According to Hollywood Life, Gerry and Madge got it on at a private Oscars after-party. They didn't leave together, but that doesn't mean anything. They could have met up in the parking lot for a little heel-sit-stay action. I'm sure he brought his muzzle. All good dogwalkers come prepared.

Will anything come of this unusual but saucy pairing? Probably not. Baby Jesus is still buzzing around (and probably still on the payroll) and Butler has said that he won't be ready to marry for another 20, 30 years. Of course by then he'll probably look like Ed Asner, but by then we'll all be over him, too. It all works out.

 

Oh, Look! Ryan Seacrest Bought A New Beard! Will Tara Conner Be His Tarnished Beauty Queen?

Doesn't like boysDoesn't like boysOr is she just a paid escort? This could also be to create some buzz for an upcoming project. Just think of the possibilities: Small town girl becomes Miss USA, goes hog wild living the high life in the NYC clubs, almost loses her crown but goes to rehab and cleans up. That's it. Poor bitch was washed up at 22.

Or was she? Maybe she was still under contract with the Donald, and completed her sentence acting as a mentor and dorm parent to up-and-comers. It could be part of her recovery process, atoning for her sins by helping others at risk. Then again, she could still like kissing younger girls. Ouch. That was catty.

Seriously, though, Tara is a pretty girl. What could she see in a guy like Ryan other than a career opportunity? It's not like she's landing any decent gigs, or at least those she gets to keep her clothes on for. Seriously, how could he possibly top a shot like this?Really doesn't like boysReally doesn't like boys

 
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