Syndicate

Zsa Zsa and her prince in happier timesPoor Zsa Zsa. After a flamboyant life full of husbands, diamonds and more husbands, she's lying in a hospital bed after breaking her hip in a fall. If it was a fall and not something more sinister.

Zsa Zsa's husband's name is not really Von Asshat, but it's something close, and it sure fits him. He's been freeloading off her for like 20 years now. He's been embroiled in a bitter court battle over money with her daughter, a Hilton by birth (Zsa Zsa was once married to Paris Hilton's grandfather, Conrad). He even claimed to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby. He's always been a bit of a doofus, but is he a murdering doofus?

Maybe, according to the Globe, who say that Zsa Zsa was "found in a pool of blood". They apparently have a top investigator (he must have the office next to their inside source) who believes she may be the victim of a murder attempt. By who? The Prince? The daughter? The cop she slapped, earning herself a brief jail sentence? The Globe claims they're going to rip the lid off this story and bring us the real truth - and published yet another "hospital deathbed" photo that's eerily similar to the one of Gary Coleman and his demented former spouse. I wonder how much they paid the Prince for those shots.

BrittanyWell that was quick, wasn't it? And unfortunately, it's also not surprisingly in the least. The LA County Coroner has ruled Brittany's death was caused by "community acquired pneumonia, iron deficiency anemia, and multiple drug intoxication", according to TMZ. That pretty much means that like Anna Nicole Smith, Brittany had some serious health issues but the people around her kept her too f**ked up to seek proper medical treatment.

Perhaps that's the real reason Slimy Simon canceled his fundraiser grand opening for his Brittany Murphy Foundation, a new non-profit he's founding with no clear goals or organization but worth, in his mind, $1,000 a plate. Perhaps Simon's thinking about the prescription bottles found with his name on them ... or all those ATM withdrawals investigators may find.

Will Simon, or anybody else, face charges over Brittany's death? It remains to be seen, but obviously someone dropped the ball. I wonder how long it will be before Brittany's mom (and heir) gets sick of his malarkey and sends him to the curb.

It was just a few pills ...Paging Dr. Conrad Murray! Seriously, if his name pops up in this mess I'll choke on a Wheat Thin, but there was a boatload of pills found in Brittany's house. Some were in her name, some in Simple Simon's, Brittany's mother (way to go there, Ma), and other as-yet unidentified third parties. Did she, like Michael Jackson and Anna Nicole Smith, get drugs under assumed names or those of her employees? No one knows for sure just yet, but the LA Coroner intends to find out.

In addition to a heart condition, it's now being reported that she also suffered from severe anemia. She had lost so much weight recently; could that be a result? Creepier still, her regular doctors hadn't seen her in months, so now they have to track down whoever she was seeing and find out what they were giving her. With the toxicology results not in yet, it remains to be seen what role drugs played in Brittany's death. We've already seen the role they played in her life ... and the tragic outcome.

MurdererLet's not gild the lily here. Everyone knows Howard K. Douche, with the help of two greedy and unscrupulous doctors, used massive amounts of dope to keep Anna Nicole under control. Something happened though, down in the Bahamas after little Danielynn was born. Just days later Anna's beloved son Daniel OD'd right there in the room with her.

When Anna went back to Florida she was in terrible shape. Hopelessly addicted to multiple narcotics and riddled with untreated infections, she finally succumbed to a massive overdose on February 8, 2007.

Did Daniel and then Anna stumble onto something Howard didn't want anyone to know? He had her under such a spell that she even claimed Danielynn was his baby and he choreographed a hideously fake wedding ceremony on a boat in the Bahamas. Good thing it wasn't legally binding or Danielynn would be stuck in a foster home somewhere ... or worse.

Finally the authorities are starting to investigate the murky circumstances around Anna's death. Following the arrest of Howard K. and the docs in LA, Florida just announced they're reopening their investigation as well. Surely all those trained law enforcement professionals don't think it's merely coincidental that Howard was always around when these things happened. If they can prove he gave her all those drugs they might just have a case.

Watch out Judge Judy!Larry Seidlin aka the wacky judge who presided over Anna Nicole's burial case, has a development deal!

If you didn't think the judge was playing to the cameras during the trial, you were wrong. He has hooked up with CBS Television Development for his very own court show in 2008. Just moments after he resigned from Florida family court, mind you. This man knows what he is doing.

I'd like to state for the record that I will not be supporting Seidlin's move to TV. Not necessarily because I think his actions were calculated and seedy (which they were). But because Joe Brown is my judge of choice.