Syndicate

Oh, look! She's in her favorite position!I mean, how could she not? She got a little taste of fame when her fiance died in the World Trade Center attack, and she took to it like a cracky to the stem. She was a mousy little blond then; she got her boobs done, her lips inflated, etc., etc., and then set out to starf**k her way to the top. Gotta hand it to her, too - she did better than most. David Boreanaz, Tiger Woods, and God knows how many other wealthy married men were chewed up and spit out in her quest. Yes, that's right, Rachel. God knows, and yes, you will burn.

Tiger knew what she was all about. That's why his $10 million settlement came with a gag order prohibiting her from talking about him at all. She can't even mention his name or risk having to give it all back, and let's face it, this is a bitch who gives nothing back. Her dead fiance's family could tell you that.

So for this piece of shit attention whore to show up at Ground Zero, sacred to all New Yorkers, with Dr.-F**king-Drew and a camera crew to film a spot where she reads a letter to her lost love and gets all emotional for the cameras ... bitch, PLEASE. That's sacrilege, like filming porn in the vestibule of St. Patrick's, to those of us who lived through that terrible, terrible time. So, yes, Rachel, you will burn in hell for what you've done. I only wish I could be there to light the wick and hand out the marshmallows. Shameless, disgraceful, soulless bitch.

Taylor on setThat's right. Little J looks like she will returning to her favorite Upper East Side crew after some serious MIA time. In real life Taylor is spending less time on the show in an attempt to pretend that she is a rock star. She seems to be convinced that this will become true if she just wears enough black eyeliner and no pants like ever. Ivanka Trump will also be doing a cameo for the show. This is long overdue as she is one of the success stories of an Upper East Side kid with crazy parents actually going out and working and making something of herself unlike Paris and dozens of others. Blake Lively's boobs were also making one of their daily cameos. They have seriously been dressing her like a dominatrix recently.

You got to give her PR team credit for getting her the cover of Vanity Fair so it would be perfectly timed with her release from jail. Nice job guys. Lindsay opens up to the mag with her usua story of how she did experiment with some drugs but like who doesn't and who wouldn't drink a lot if your dad was that dude. Though I am not sure if her logic about drinking with a scram bracelet on is sound. Lindsay on Vanity FairAnyway, Lindsay's eyes have been looking a lot less glazed over so maybe she is finally on the right path. Here is what she told the magazine:

"I want my career back. I want the respect that I had when I was doing great movies. And if that takes not going out to a club at night, then so be it. It's not fun anyway."

"I don't care what anyone says. I know that I'm a damn good actress. ... And I know that in my past I was young and irresponsible -- but that's what growing up is. You learn from your mistakes," she says.

"If I were the alcoholic everyone says I am, then putting a [SCRAM] bracelet on would have ended me up in detox, in the emergency room, because I would have had to come down from all the things that people say I'm taking and my father says I'm taking -- so that says something, because I was fine," she explains.

On her father: "I think my biggest focus for myself is learning how to continue to get through the trauma that my father has caused in my life."

I'll violate you like a parking meterYes, and I understand he got rather pissy with the cop who pulled him over. Stallone's ego is legendary; I can just hear him saying, "Don't you know who I am? Don't you know who the F**K I am?" Just look at the puss on his face!

Sly's new movie is doing pretty well at the theaters, but it's nothing compared to the way he used to pack 'em in. For those of you too young or too fried to remember, this is the guy who wrote, starred in and received an Oscar for Rocky. Laugh if you will, but that was a great freakin' movie, one of my guilty pleasures. (All of the Rocky films are. Hey, I never claimed to be an Ebert.) He was also Rambo ... and then there were gems like Judge Dredd and that wretched thing about his mother. Can't win 'em all, I guess, but you have to admit he's got a better track record than most, yet he doesn't have the A-list clout he used to - and it must piss him off something fierce.

KeriIt was quite this show for year and there were some actual surprises this year, at least for the comedy awards, which is always pleasant because the Emmy's can get rather competitive. Though I do love me some Neil Patrick Harris and want him to be my best friend I was thrilled that his CBS colleague and Big Bang Theory star Jim Parsons won for best actor in a comedy. Week after week he turns out an amazing performance and he deserved to be recognized! Jane Lynch nabbed Glee's only acting award of the night after they were nominated for four (Ryan Murphy won for directing) and was lovely as usual. The big upset was though that Modern Family managed to win over Glee but actually Modern Family has better writing and Glee has plenty of chances to win and maybe we are getting a little glee-ed out. And then of course Mad Men and some people from Breaking Bad won as well as Archie Panjabi on The Good Wife and finally Kyra Sedgewick won for The Closer. Oh and Edie Falco won like her 17th Emmy. After winning 15 times for The Sopranos now she gets to dominate the comedic category with Nurse Jackie. And now for the fashion!! Though I wasn't die-hard loving anyone's dress (well maybe Clare Danes) there were a few that cane close. First of all Clare Danes, who won best actress for her work in the television film Temple Graden, looked great. The film took home three acting awards, best director and best film. Clare may be getting her stalled career back on track with this one. She wore a beaded Armani Prive and with her blond hair she looked like the picture of perfect glamour.